…and maybe that’s the reason why absolutely no girls deal with me. I’m not someone much people really want to chill with, high school was proof of that.
I’m a paradox. I want to be happy, but I think of things that make me sad. I’m lazy, yet I’m ambitious. I don’t like myself, but I also love who I am. I say I don’t care, but I really do. I crave attention, but reject it when it comes my way. I’m a conflicted contradiction. If I can’t figure myself out, there’s no way anyone else has.
I don’t care about summer. Everyone looks forward to summer when they’re mere weeks from finishing school before break. I didn’t care about summer, infact I wasn’t looking forward to it. I had a feeling it was gonna be my typical shitty summer.
I remember one summer when I was in middle school I rode my bike quite a few blocks down from place to look for some of my “friends/classmates” and I could not find them. I think I rode around my bike for a little and went back home.
I don’t know.
I don’t care about summer, I have neutral feelings about my birthday, and for myself I don’t care about Christmas(the non-religious side of it).
Maybe it’s because I’ve got excited for those things but was disappointed constantly I stopped caring. I was a little excited for this mastering session we were supposed to have a few weeks back… that got rescheduled, disappointed once I got even just a little excited.
I’ve been disappointed to point that I stop caring a whole lot.
I don’t really get excited for… anything. A majority of the time I just don’t care, or I just feel neutral which makes think I don’t care.
” After taking LSD. I lighting up a candle in the middle of the wood and during the 30 secondes of exposure, i make a meditation about the holism of nature surrounding me. Feeling the crystal vibration irradiating from the center of the Gaia mother earth. So in this picture i try to show you the magic,sacred metaphysical quality of the nature and new age bullshiting you. “